For many survivors of abuse, traditional "talk therapy" eventually hits a plateau. You may have spent years articulating what happened to you, deconstructing the abuser's tactics, and understanding your triggers intellectually. Yet, despite this high level of insight, your body remains stuck in the past. When triggered, your heart still races, your throat tightens, and that familiar wave of panic or numbness—the "somatic freeze"—takes over as if the trauma were happening in the present moment. While many understand the neurobiology of trauma bonds, resolving the physical 'anchor' requires a bottom-up approach.

Navigating an abusive relationship is often described as trying to navigate through a dense, disorienting "fog." Even after the physical threat has been removed, many survivors find themselves struggling with a profound sense of confusion, an inability to trust their own memory, and a feeling of being fundamentally "broken."

People stay in abusive relationships not due to weakness, but due to a powerful biological phenomenon called a Trauma Bond. This occurs when the brain becomes "addicted" to the dopamine rush of reconciliation following the cortisol spike of abuse, creating a cycle that is as physically difficult to break as a chemical dependency.

San Diego offers many forms of mental health support—including private therapy, trauma care, community clinics, crisis lines, and online options. Having this range available can make the process of getting help feel less overwhelming. Find out what you need to know before you start exploring.

Finding a therapist in San Diego can feel overwhelming, and it’s completely understandable if you’re not sure where to start—especially when you’re already carrying stress, anxiety, or emotional pain.  With so many options across the county, the process can feel confusing.

Leaving an abusive relationship is often the most dangerous time for a survivor. It is a period of intense transition where the abuser’s sense of control is threatened, often leading to a spike in volatile behavior. Because of this, "just leaving" is not a simple act of willpower—it is a strategic operation that requires careful physical, digital, and emotional preparation.

High-achievers are driven by ambition and the pursuit of excellence. While having drive and determination can lead to remarkable accomplishments, it can also take a significant toll on our mental health. The relentless pursuit of success can lead to stress, burnout, and a diminished sense of well-being.

“So, you just…talk?” This is a common reaction that many people have when thinking about therapy. Can “just talking” really be that helpful? While therapists may wish to defend the field as being more than “just talking”, I would like to offer a perspective that speaks to how powerful talking to someone can really be. 

How we start our mornings can significantly impact our entire day. Establishing healthy morning habits not only energizes us but also sets a positive tone for our mental and physical well-being. Here's why prioritizing the following habits can help you set your day off to a good start.

Oftentimes, our resistance to leaving, or rather expanding our comfort zone, is merely due to our fear of failure. But we neglect to recognize the fact that we are already setting ourselves up for failure by refusing to try. Where there is no risk, there is no change.

Humans are narrative creatures, and we make meaning of the experiences that we have in our lives. Our nervous system is no different. Our nervous system state (Ventral Vagal, Sympathetic, and Dorsal Vagal Shutdown) sends signaling to our brains which gets interpreted through story–the same is true for the state of our nervous system.

There are rare moments in life where it really feels like it’s you against the world. Moments when all you have is memories of the connections you’ve shared. Moments where you’ve gone through all the waves of emotion that come with grief, loss, and heartbreak.

The first thing we do when we are in pain is seek relief. That is our human instinct. The more intolerable the pain, the more urgently we seek for an instant solution. Our thoughts become consumed only with ideas of how we can stop the pain, and our fears come into their fullest form as we begin to worry that if we don’t find something to stop the pain, it will never stop.

It is so important to pay attention to our emotional experiences to properly grow and heal. Our emotions are a tool for us to get our conscious mind in touch with our subconscious experience. Oftentimes our emotions and bodies respond to an experience before we are even aware of what is causing those feelings. That being said, sometimes our immediate reaction to the more difficult emotions, such as loneliness or anger, can cause us to act impulsively.

There are so many mixed messages in our society, families and social groups that cause confusion on what healthy looks like. There are messages that being healthy means we have everything figured out, that we have no self-esteem issues, that we are able to manage our feelings and emotions without involving other people, or that we have our diet and weight under control. 

It’s so easy to project our self esteem onto everyone and everything but ourselves. Sometimes this can look like needing excessive amounts of validation from others, basing our own value on our achievements, or deriving our confidence from our appearance. The problem with these examples is that they are all external. Having a high self esteem will never be sustainable as long as it’s coming from anywhere outside of ourselves.